Life is....LOVE

I started back to work a week ago and it was so hard! However, I only cried two out of the four days. I fell right back into routine and while I HATE leaving Abby, I do realize it's just one of those things I have to do.
I have a very dear friend, who I will name T, that works with me. She told me a story last week about how much she loves her son and how she always made sure that he knew that. She used to carpool with a girl who had a very close relationship with her parents. When asked by T if she was loved growing up, the girl replied, "Oh my gosh was I loved!" T knew from that point on that she wanted her son to be able to say the same thing if he was ever asked that question.
As she was telling me this story, I realized I wanted the same thing for Abby. However, the more I thought about it, I want her to be able to say a similar answer to two more questions: "Did your parents love Jesus?" and "Did your parents love each other?"
I firmly believe that without Jesus, nothing is possible. Jake and I have to LIVE out our faith in front of our little girl for her to truly believe us and what we say. If we live like we love Jesus, she'll see Him at work in us and He will be undeniable. I want her to know without a doubt that we love Jesus and that we love Him the most; above ANYTHING or ANYONE else.
In order for Abby to know what a GOOD and HEALTHY relationship looks like, she needs one modeled for her. I pray that Jake and I will do that for her. I don't want us to be disgusting in front of her, but we will show our love in front of her. To the point that it might embarrass her in front of her friends, and we might hear an "Oh Mom. Oh Dad." BUT, she will secretly want the very same thing in a husband of her own because she will see and know that we love each other.
Lastly, I want her to know that we love her like crazy! All the hugs, kisses, and gifts in the world can't take the place of truly learning her and what speaks love to her.

So Abby, if one day several years down the road, you read this, please know that your Mommy and Daddy love three main things: Jesus, each other, and you (and yes, in that order). There will be times you will wish that order was different, but your Daddy and I made a commitment to each other that we would always keep this order because it's what works and it's what God commanded. We love you like crazy and know that one day you'll be able to say, "Oh my gosh did they love Jesus, each other and me!!"

Life is....all about adjusting

It's been a while since I have had time to write. Between caring for an infant and trying to live between two houses (neither of which are ours), it's been a little crazy.

To update you, Abby is now 8 weeks old. We went for her one month appointment last month and she was up to 8 lbs, 13.5 ozs, and 20 inches long. At birth, she was 7 lbs, 4 ozs and 19 3/8 inches long. When we left the hospital, she was 6 lbs, 8 ozs. So she is gaining weight very well! In fact, she's average for her age in weight. However, not in length. Abby is in the 10th percentile for length (she gets it honest). No worries though! Being short isn't all THAT bad! Abby goes back for her two month appointment on Friday, the 29th. I can't wait to see how she's grown in a month.

Maternity leave.....I took 8 weeks of maternity leave and can honestly say that I wasn't so sure about it at the beginning. I was so exhausted all of the time and felt a little stir-crazy on most days. About 2 weeks ago, I really started to enjoy all of the time that I was getting to spend with Abby. She started interacting more and awarding all of my crazy behavior (made up songs, facial expressions, and crazy voices when reading) with smiles, coos, and giggles. I started dreading going back to work then. Don't get me wrong, I have an AWESOME person to take care of her. BUT, I would much rather spend my days playing with her all day then to go to work.

I officially go back tomorrow, October 25. I am DREADING this day. I don't deal with change well and everything changes tomorrow. I am used to my typical schedule in the mornings and now, I have no idea how things are going to work because I have another little body to take care of. I'm planning on getting up earlier and leaving earlier than I'm accustomed to. Since having Abby around, I have been consistently late to everything! I haven't found the time frame it takes to care for her and me and get us to where we need to be on time! I also have to give up what has been life for me for the past 8 weeks. I had gotten into a routine with Abby - feed, burp, change diapers - and now I have to change all of that and adjust to a new routine. How that is going to play out is anyone's guess!

Long story short, I am asking for prayers for me and my family this week. It's going to be extremely hard on me. Jake will have to deal with me being upset and Abby's going to have to deal with me not wanting to let her go! So please pray for all of us.

Life is...Beautiful!

Well, a lot has occurred since my last posting and my life has changed dramatically! Abby Jade Tilley is now here and I couldn't be any happier. She was 5 weeks early, but still a very healthy weight. Here's how things went down...

On August 24, I took my blood pressure at home using my grandfather's blood pressure cuff. It came back pretty high (150/100) and I got a little concerned. However, I took it later on and it was back down to my normal range (which since I started back working had progressively gotten a little higher, but not unsafe). On August 25, I took my blood pressure again that evening and it was back up in that dangerous range. It never came back down to a safe place, but Jake and I chalked it up to (hopefully) a problem with the blood pressure cuff. On August 26, my grandfather replaced the batteries and I retook my blood pressure. Still dangerously high. I left out for work with the intentions of having the school nurse take it and hopefully tell me it was high but not as high as I thought. Not the case. She took it and gave me the verdict...160/98. I immediately placed a call to the doctor to let him know what was going on with me. I had to wait for a little while to get a call back, but when I did, he sent me for a non-stress test at the hospital. I left work with all intentions of going back, maybe with a bed rest order, but still, going back to get my stuff.
I went for my test. By the time I got to the hospital, my blood pressure was up to 168/111. I laid in a bed on my left side for about an hour hooked up to monitors (blood pressure and fetal monitor). I also had a little button to push every time Abby moved. After laying there and watching my blood pressure go up and not down too terribly much, the doctor came in with an ultrasound machine. He reported to me that they had found protein in my urine sample and that given all of the information (mine and what they had collected), I had pre-eclampsia. He said it could be mild or severe and mine was severe. Since my heart rate and the baby's heart rate were fine, he said he wanted to make sure both of us stayed healthy. He immediately admitted me and told me he would induce labor at about 1:30 that afternoon.
Now, you need to understand where Jake was during all of this. Thursday was his day off and he NEVER does anything on his day off (except my honey-do list). On this day, he had made plans to go to Georgia to ride dirt bikes with a friend and had left at about 7:00 am. I had been in contact with him - he knew about the blood pressure, phone call to the doctor and the non-stress test. Everything happened so fast that I only had a few minutes to text him and tell him that they were inducing me and for him to get on the road home. However, the doctor and nurses came right in and started telling me all sorts of instructions and wheeling me to a room. He was calling me like crazy (he thought I was kidding), but I couldn't answer!
Well, Jake made it back to the hospital before they induced and I couldn't have been happier. We were both scared to death and not ready for all of this to happen. We didn't have the car seat installed or the hospital bag packed (we still thought we had at least another month). What we did know is that we were going to meet Abby soon! They put me on magnesium (just in case my blood pressure caused a seizure) and sodium chloride. After 5 pills to try to induce labor, the doctor decided that I wasn't ever going to be ready to go into full blown labor. On August 27, the doctors came in and told me that at this point, the only option that made sense was to do a C-section. This was not in the plan!! I wanted to do an all-natural birth and a C-section was the farthest thing from this! We discussed the options and decided that a C-section, although unwanted, was necessary to make my blood pressure come down to a safe place and to make sure that Abby didn't go into distress.
I was scheduled for late morning, but was bumped due to an emergency. I ended up going in around noon and at 12:24 pm on August 27, my little Abby Jade made her entrance into this world. It wasn't at all the way I planned, but I was so happy to have her here. She was absolutely beautiful.
We ended up staying in the hospital for 6 days (moving from labor/delivery to mom/baby to a transition room). I was discharged a day before Abby was. She had a few complications due to being early (jaundice and weight loss), but those were corrected and we were finally allowed to go home on Wednesday, September 1.
Having my beautiful baby girl by induction and then C-section was not the way I planned, but she made it here safely, and I did too, so it was all worth it. Now I can't imagine my life without her.

Life is....going quicker than I imagined!

Sorry it has been so long since my last entry. Life has been crazy busy and moving so quickly that I haven't had a lot of time to sit down and collect my thoughts. I had a few minutes so I thought that I would try to update.

First of all, we sold our house! YAY!!! We closed on our house July 30. You have to understand the craziness that was created by this. We were told we would close August 6. However, the buyers came back to us after this and requested August 2. However, in the end, the buyers wanted the 30th as the closing date since one of them needed to get out of a rental in time. We didn't know until the day before EXACTLY when our closing date would be so you can imagine the struggles we had with packing. It could not and would not have happened if it had not been for our AMAZING families who worked on getting boxes, packing, storing, and helping us move.

Secondly, we moved in with my grandfather and I have to say I was a little nervous. However, after living there since the 30th, I can honestly say that I LOVE it! There has not been one morning where I have not had breakfast cooked for me and on the table waiting for me to eat. Jake loves that he has someone who he can talk baseball with. We are a little tight on space, but I think we'll be able to make everything work. Now I just need some time to get things put in their proper place (i.e. nesting)!

The last huge thing (besides my ever growing belly) that has happened since my last posting is that Jake and I went to Vision of Life and got to see our beautiful baby girl! She looks JUST like her daddy. We are super excited and cannot wait for Abby to join our family fully. We are so ready for her!

Please continue to pray for us that God would mold us into the parents we need to be. Also, please pray for Abby that she would continue to grow, develop, and be born exactly the way that she should be!

Life is...MOVING!

Sorry that it has been so long since my last posting, but life has been SUPER busy! First of all, we've had a few doctor's appointments for dear, sweet Abby and the doctor has reported that she is doing just fine. The doctors have said that all of my numbers look great and that her heartbeat is perfect! Such a relief and I feel nothing short of blessed to have a healthy baby. I did have my glucose tolerance test done (really, it wasn't that bad) and that came back fine too. Abby moves like crazy daily. She has had several times where I think she was having a party! Feeling her move has been one of the major highlights of this pregnancy. It's so unexplainable to feel something inside of you move and KNOW that it is your own little baby.
Secondly, we put our house on the market in late April. Well, we have been showing it since then and this past week, we found a buyer!!! It's not officially sold yet, but it is under contract. I've got to give props to our awesome realtor, Holly Gunnels. She worked very hard on helping us to do things to get this house sold. Now, we have to go through the appraisal process, home inspection, termite inspection, and closing. Supposedly, all of this is going to be done by August 6 and we'll officially be homeless! I never thought I would be so excited!!
Please continue to pray that Abby would develop appropriately into the healthy (in mind and body) baby that I already know she is. Also pray for our house to pass all of the little "tests" and be able to be SOLD completely. That will be such a weight off!

Things coming up:
-July 10: Childbirth class and Maternity tour
-July 24: 3D/4D ultrasound at Vision of Life (I am the MOST excited about this one!!)
-July 29: Doctor's appointment

Life is Two Girls and a Boy!

We officially found out the gender of our little one on May 10, 2010. It's a girl! Jake is officially outnumbered! The whole appointment was very funny and this may be TMI, but it makes the story so here goes.

I had heard from a very reputable friend and my sister that I should have a full bladder when I went in to have the ultrasound done because it makes the contrast better. I took them at their words! I drank a cup of milk at 7:15ish that morning and then proceeded to drink about 24 more ounces of water. Needless to say I was about to bust by 11:00 when Jake came to get me for the appointment (the last time I had went to the bathroom was at about 6:15 that morning). The appointment wasn't until 11:30 and we THOUGHT if we got there early, we would possibly get to go back early. Not the case. In fact, we were taken back about 30 minutes later! So I went for about 6 hours with no potty breaks!

When the ultrasound tech got us back to the room, she started looking at the baby. She couldn't get the baby to stretch out and then she caught a glimpse of my bladder. She told me that she was so surprised that I wasn't whining! I guess she underestimated the power of a teacher bladder! She told me to go and empty completely and then come back because my little one had NO room to move!

I did as she said and came back. While I was gone, Jake and the tech (Susan) were talking about what he thought it was. If you know us, you know Jake was dead set that this baby was a boy. So much so, that we bought blue Mother's Day gifts for our moms. Well, I come back and get all geared up again. Immediately, our baby spread her legs and showed the world that she was a girl. Susan looks at Jake and says, "Daddy, you were wrong!" Jake's face went into sheer terror and said, "Are you sure?" This was probably one of the funniest moments of my life!

The ultrasound continued and she took all of her developmental shots. By the way, she gave our baby girl an A+!! A strong heartbeat, 2 arms, 10 fingers, 2 legs, and 10 toes! Abby (our baby girl) wasn't very cooperative and didn't want to move. She laid on her side the entire time, even when I moved. In one shot, we saw her covering her face with her hands as if she were saying, "Please leave me alone." In the ONE profile shot we did get, she moved her hand (which was so cool to watch and feel at the same time) and placed it on her head (diva-style, no less) as if she were saying, "Fine, but only one."

I can't believe that my unborn child has such an attitude already, but I am so glad that she does. I have prayed for her since the day I found out she was growing inside of me and I pray that she continues to grow and develop the way she has been going! She currently weighs about 15 ounces and they have moved my due date to September 19 from September 28.

Please continue to pray for Jake and me as parents and for Abby, that she would grow developmentally correct. Also pray for her spiritual health and her future husband. It's never too early to start!!

Life is Different...

At my last blog, I revealed the fact that I was pregnant and justly titled it...Life is Changing. At that point, I hadn't had a lot of changes in my life; only a picture of a little blob (my little blob), some "morning" sickness (so grossly misnamed), and a positive pregnancy test. I am currently 15 weeks (almost 16) pregnant.

Life is Different...I would totally agree with this statement. I went from spending the first 13 - 14 weeks throwing up at every movement and just feeling plain miserable. It makes it VERY hard to be the excited mommy I wanted to be when all I wanted to do was sleep and throw up. I had some type of virus March 28. I couldn't believe the toll this virus took on my body. I spent 2 full days in bed throwing up even more and running a dreadful fever. After this, I haven't thrown up since!

At the last doctor's appointment (13 weeks), we got to get another ultrasound. This is not normal, but my heartbeat and the baby's heartbeat were in the exact same place. So to be sure that my baby's heartbeat was okay, they hooked me up to the ultrasound machine. I didn't mind at all! We got to see that our baby actually has a head, 2 arms, and 2 little legs that were crossed! It was so much more exciting now that our baby looked like a baby! The doctor did a great job of walking us through what everything was - the beginnings of ribs, the heartbeat, the movements of the baby! I have to say, I left that appointment more in love with this baby than ever before.

It's still hard to believe that this is all real. I'm not showing a lot although I have started to wear some maternity clothes - they are just so much more comfortable. Overall, at 15 weeks, I have only gained 4.6 pounds. When you're as short as I am, there's not a lot of space for the weight to go. I was laying on the couch March 30 and felt this little flutter in my lower tummy. I had never felt anything like it before, but it happened again two more times in the same exact spot. According to everyone I have talked to and everything I have read, it was the baby moving!

Like I said before, this is still so surreal to me. I can't believe that there is life inside of me. It probably won't really start to sink in until I have a huge belly and know exactly what that little one is (girl or boy). Speaking of that, my next doctor's appointment is the 21st (17 weeks). They said we probably wouldn't try to see the gender then, but set up an appointment for the next week or next to find out what this little one is. So for now, we wait. Please continue to remember us in your prayers as we progress in this pregnancy. Pray that our baby is developing perfectly both physically and mentally. Please pray that Jake and I will continue to become the parents God wants us to be!